The Prowler (1981)

I just recently watched The Prowler for the first time. Oddly enough I have managed to overlook this gem which is a mystery because it features the early work of legendary make up artist Tom Savini who has done work in some of the Friday the 13th films,  George Romero's Dawn of the Dead, and many other iconic horrors. This film is also directed by Joseph Zito who ends up working with Savini again in Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter in 1984.

So already this film has the ingredients for a successful slasher, not to mention some pretty sick cover art. You get in this movie what you see on the cover: an awesomely bad ass killer in WWII army gear prowling on the youth. The movie starts off with a handwritten break up letter written to a soldier called to duty. Apparently him being away was too hard for his lady, Rosemary, so she decides to move on and see other people. Shortly after a ship of soldiers coming home back to the states arrive. The year is 1945. Rosemary, now with a new man, is at her college graduation dance. The lovers decide to escape to a romantically lit dock on the water. Our prowler of course appears and kills them both with a pitchfork. Revenge! After the double murder the town decides, NO MORE DANCES! So our heart broken killer hushes down for quite some time. 

We fast forward to 35 years later, 1980, where the town prepares to bring back the graduation dance. This of course stirs up a bit of controversy at the town of Avalon Bay. This takes plan in New Jersey and was filmed in Cape May. I myself am a New Jersey native so already I have a biased opinion and think this is fucking awesome. Our masked killer makes a come back the night of the dance and starts to pick off his victims. Some of these deaths include a pitchfork to the stomach shower scene, a jock stabbed in the head so hard his eyes roll back in shock, a few standard throat slices, and a lot of wandering...and more wandering. Yes, this film starts off on a high note and at about 25 minutes in it starts to slow down, almost to a grinding halt. We have a decent kill count, but they almost become filler. Our last 10 minutes however pick back up with an intense chase scene. We find out who our masked WWII killer is, and it's so incredibly obvious that even Helen Keller could figure it out in the first 15 minutes. The end does have an epic head explosion via gun shot. Tom Savini at his best! 

The vibe of this film is very much like Friday the 13th meets Prom Night. Not the most clever writing, but we have 3 satisfying kills and one really cool looking killer. This is the sort of film that follows the classic rules of the early slashers, so it is definitely a crowd pleaser and worth seeing. Plus who doesn't want to go on a killing spree 35 years after getting your heart broken?

Blood Diner (1987)

There is nothing I love more than obscure 80s horror, especially ones that are "bad" because it probably means that there is a killer soundtrack, weird deaths, funny dialogue, and some really cool post punk outfits. Just recently I decided to give Blood Diner a stab since I have never had the chance to see it. It was just, awful. Believe me...I always love a low budget obscure horror...but this was just...awful. 

Based on the cover I assumed it was going to be about a hole in the wall diner out in the middle of nowhere in which the owners probably killed people in the diner and then served them for a lunch special the next day. They should have called this movie Blood What the Hell am I Watching? There is TOO Much Going on, Is this Movie Over Yet, Is This Even a Horror or a Comedy? Because that is exactly what I thought.

The film starts off with 2 brothers as kids (Mikey and Georgie) left at home by their mother, who literally leaves them alone at the house to go to the grocery store to, and I quote, "get some god damn tampons". Shortly after their crazy Uncle Anwar (who even has a name like "Anwar"?) busts through the door with a meat cleaver and tells the boys who are making pretend food his good byes, for moments after police shoot him dead in front of their house since he had been on a killing spree. We fast forward about 10-20 years in time to the 2 brothers as adults. They are digging up their dead uncle for his brain for they want to resurrect him from the dead. They do so, however, their uncle is nothing more than a talking brain and a set of eyes in a jar. After this resurrection the uncle demands that the brothers find the sleaziest women to kill and take their body parts to restore the life of the hell goddess Sheetar. In between all this they also run a diner that serves healthy food...vegetable dishes with human parts mixed in. Okay, now we can call it "Blood Diner". 

This film is sort of like Maniac meets Frankenhooker meets Street Trash. Slasher flicks usually have some comedy elements in slashers which is what makes them so fun to watch, but normally it was still 80% horror and 20% comedy. (I just pulled these numbers out of my ass, but I'd say it's pretty accurate). Slashers in general leave a lot of room for fantasy and creativity. Blood Diner really didn't have a good story. The movie kept going on, and on. There was no balance. It seems to me like they were throwing everything they could at the viewer for the sake of shock value. To be honest, I didn't care about the story, the characters, or overall style. This is coming from the person who will love a movie that has a shitty plot but an amazing atmosphere. I can't believe I am saying this about an 80's horror, but I really hated it and don't plan on ever seeing it again. Surprisingly enough, a lot of people seem to like this movie! I have read a lot of reviews, and I feel like I am working against the grain on this one. I understand why it has it's cult following, but it just wasn't for me. 

However, I will give credit where credit is due. Some scenes worth calling out are the naked aerobics massacre, the vegetarian trucker throwing up all over the diner, and the end ritual zombie scene at the goth bar blasting some Rammstein esque music. By all means, give this one a shot if you love your VHS era films and splatter punk. 

Silent Night Deadly Night (1984)

One thing I am always a sucker for are Christmas themed horror flicks. It probably stems from my hatred of this Holiday. It seems taboo to say that you hate Christmas, but if you ever worked in retail, you too would feel the same and would love nothing more then to see Santa Clause hack a bunch of people to death.

So in celebration of this Holiday season, I have decided to write about Silent Night, Deadly Night. The film starts off with young Billy and his family driving somewhere in the middle of Utah to visit crazy Grandpa at the mental hospital. When they arrive, Grandpa is sitting in his rocking chair in his usual comatose state. The parents leave little 8 year old Billy alone with him. Moments later Grandpa warns Billy about Santa Clause, and that if he see's Santa, he better run for his life. This immediately panics Billy and his parents come back but of course Grandpa is back to his quiet state. On the car ride back from the Christmas Eve visit they spot a man in a Santa suite broken down on the side of the road. His parents decide to pull over and help Santa. Little do they know that Santa is actually a burglar with a gun. Billy witnesses his parents get murdered and manages to get away.

This film is separated in 3 parts. Young Billy's back story, his time at the orphanage, and him at 18 as our killer Santa. So we move forward to his time at an orphanage under the rule of a strict heartless nun who refuses to acknowledge Billy's psychological damage, but instead she punishes him for any time he has an episode related to his hazy memory. Over time Mother Superior only adds to his trauma, ultimately creating a psycho in the making, brain washing him to think that "punishment is necessary, punishment is good".

So we get to Billy at 18. He grows up to be a soft spoken hunk! The nice nun who has always looked out for Billy, Sister Margaret, sets him up with a job as a stock room worker at a toy store. Of course the Christmas season creeps up on him and he is faced with Christmas decorations, and even having to dress up as Santa for the children. My favorite scene is when he has to have the children sit on his lap making him so uncomfortable and the worse Santa to take your kid to. One young girl was fidgeting all over, being really difficult and Billy Santa Clause looks right at her and says "you're being naughty" to intimidate her to stop. Hilarious. Shortly after the staff at the toy store has their holiday party. Our sweet handsome Billy sees the coworker he is crushing on being raped by a stock room clerk in the back. Anything sexual is a trigger for Billy since he saw his mother being taken advantage of before the Santa Clause thief killed her. He finally snaps and goes on a killing spree in his Santa Clause suit. Some of his killings include a Christmas light strangling and even pushing a teenager through deer antlers mounter on the wall. At the end of the film Billy makes his way back to the orphanage Christmas Morning to finish his rampage and kill Mother Superior. All the children in the orphanage embrace him as he walks in, unaware that he is not the Santa they had in mind. Billy takes his ax and lifts it to kill Mother Superior, but in the nick of time is shot down by a cop and the day is saved. The real tragedy is that he didn't get to kill off Mother Superior since she is the person who inflicted all this mental abuse that created the monster he became. All the children scream and Christmas is ruined. Chances are these children are all going to be a bunch of Billy's in the making and are going to need lots of medication and therapy. At the very end of the film we see a young boy who looks disturbed by all this and already putting people on his "naughty" list. Of course this leaves room open for a sequel.

What I love most about this movie is all the uproar that took place when it was released. A bunch of conservative bible hugging parents protested, as well as Siskel and Ebert who publically called out the director, writer, and producer of the film on their show and stated that this was a film made to ruin Christmas and just wanted to make money off of shock value and blood guts. The film was even pulled from the theaters shortly after it's release. So of course that means that this film is nothing short of awesome, and a must watch for anyone into slashers. Another interesting idea from this movie is that it's not just a "Killer Santa" film. It's a film that allows you to empathize, relate, and even feel bad for the killer. The real monsters of the film were the ones responsible for creating and adding fuel to the fire of Billy's post traumatic shock of seeing a man in a Santa costume murder his parents. This low budget flick does hold some great performances by Lilyan Chauvin who played Mother Superior. Her strictness was up to par with that of Sister Jude from American Horror Story. The fan favorite seems to be the short role of Grandpa played by Will Hare. His Christmas warning sets the tone for the rest of the film and is quite chilling. That scene makes me think, was he having a premonition, did he just want to torment Billy, did he too have a Christmas trauma, did he really have these comatose episodes or was he faking it to spite his family? Regardless, it kick starts this movie early on. Naughty or nice, this film is a must see! It has a great concept, it's fun and slashery, and it celebrates the true meaning of Christmas. It also has a really cool movie poster!

The Elvira Show (The Unaired Pilot)

Just the other day I discovered that one of my horror idols, Elvira, had an unaired TV pilot back in the earlier 90s. So of course I had stop everything I was doing to watch this. It was as if I had found a missing reel from Elivra: Mistress of the Dark which has been a top 10 favorite movie of mine since I was a kiddie. By the time I was in the first grade I practically memorized all of the lines. "I cut you man!" 

Elvira is such a clever franchise and a likable character. Who does' like a B horror movie hostess with campy humor and a little sex appeal? Okay, a lot of sex appeal. It's amazing how far Cassandra Peterson took her character Elvira. She went from local access TV horror hostess, to being syndicated and breaking paving way for being the first TV program to broadcast in 3D and eventually having 2 major motion pictures. Not to mention her Elvira costume is still the number 1 costume bought even today. Her character has appeared on SNL, MTV, and many commercials. There is even an Elvira pinball machine....which I need to own one day. So knowing all this, it only makes sense for her to try to develop her own sitcom series. 

In 1993, Anne Beats, long time writer for SNL, wrote the pilot to air on CBS. The writing was witty and full of double entendres. The premise of the show was that our beloved Elvira had moved to middle America with her Aunt Minerva who is a witch with super powers. Together they have their own business of fortune telling and potion making. Shortly into the pilot Elvira finds out that her niece has come to live with them, and she too is a witch. Together the 3 need to keep their witchy powers a secret with the company of their sassy black cat who talks. The pilot it self is quite hilarious. Elvira and Aunt Minerva have this cohesive chemistry that works for television. In my opinion this show had a good shot at making it one or two seasons and should have been given that chance. The concept of the show leaves so many great opportunities for future episodes. I can see them doing several spells gone bad episodes...Elvira going on dates...interactions with their potion customers and psychic readings. We should have definitely been given at least a full season of this gem. 

But one must ask, why did ABC not air this? We have to remember that this was still a little too edgy for the 90s, and ABC is geared more towards families. So having a sexy woman in revealing clothing casting spells might not have been the right fit for their demographic. Just 3 years later did they replicate this same pilot concept for Sabrina the Teenage Witch (3 witches living together with a talking cat). So maybe The Elvira Show was just too ahead for her time. Maybe Elvira is a character that is stronger and more effective in shorter segments rather then a 30 minute long television program.  Regardless, the pilot is worth checking out for anyone who appreciates Elvira and campy humor. So in the words of our favorite mistress of the dark, I will wrap this post up by saying, "unpleasant dreams". 

Candyman (1992)

Being raised on horror movies since I was literally a baby...I was never really bothered by monsters or psycho killers. At the age of 6 my parents would buy me issues of Fangoria magazines and let me pick out a VHS horror film if I had good report cards. Horror was always just fantasy and fun. Of course some films would creep me out, but not enough to the point where I had to stop watching. But there is one movie that til this day I struggle watching and that one is Candyman. The first time I saw this movie I was probably 7. After seeing it, I was always a little creeped out looking at bathroom mirrors, thinking that our hooked hand killer was staring at me from the other side ready to rip me in two. I even had nightmares sometimes about being lost in the projects with walls covered with Candyman graffiti. So what is it about this movie that has had this lasting effect on me? Tony Todd is creepy as hell, but I know it's not him that creeps me out.

I grew up in a city called Irvington which happens to be one of the most dangerous cities in NJ, to put it frankly a good portion of this town is ghetto as hell. The film Candyman takes place in the bad parts of Chicago, where there are high crime rates, gangs, and so forth. Needless to say, it looked just like the area of town only blocks away from me. It made it feel real. There was even this high rise building that was part of the projects that had broken windows, trash all over, curtains hanging out the windows, it looked almost identical to where Candyman did his killings.

The film is about a young more privileged white woman who is doing a study on the urban legend of Candyman. The myth: say his name a few times in the mirror and he comes out with a hook for a hand and kills you. In her research she realizes this series of projects (low income housing) is terrorized by this legend to the point where there is a gang that uses this legend as their identity and terrorize. Our leading lady, Helen Lyle, decides to summon Candyman as part of her research. Throughout the film she is haunted by him as he begins to kill the people around her. He is a tall menacing black man with an oversized bloody hook for a hand. His body is covered in chewed up flesh and hoards of bees. What we realize is that this isn't just a slasher flick, but it's also a story about race and sociology. Exactly where these cursed projects sit is where Candyman him self was murdered by racist white men for sleeping with a white woman in the 1800s. The legend of Candyman isn't just a ghost story, but shows the evils that can stem from other evils.

Candyman also has a very unsettling score that some how manages to stay in your head every time you watch this film. In my opinion, the music is just as unsettling as Tony Todd. Even as I write this post I keep looking up at my bedroom mirror fearing I am going to see him. If you want to see a film that will chill you to the bone, I recommend this one.

Spoiler Alert: The interior shot of Helen in her coffin is so unsettling. As is the scene when Candyman's hook comes out of her medicine chest and then finds him standing in her hallway. Scares the hell out of me.

NECROPOLIS (1986)

When I think about the rare horror gems I have encountered, and oh there have been many, one that always sticks out is Necropolis. I saw this tim a few years ago when it aired on a cable movie channel at 2 in the morning. An appropriate time for a special film such as Necropolis . 

Lets start off with the cover art. How fucking bad ass is this? 1980's punk girl in all leather on a motorcycle surrounded by city lights and ominous figures. I really love the play on words and clever tag line. Even the type face used for the film is impressive. It's clean, graphic, pink and sexy. I want to be friends with this motorcycle chick already... oh, and she's the deadly villain from Hell too?!

The film starts 300 years prior to 1980s NYC. We see an evil white haired witch killed while preforming a sacrificial ritual that will enable her to live forever. She comes back 3 centuries later reincarnated, and guess what...she still wants eternal life and beauty, and with the help of new hellish minions. Using her powers of mind control and psychic abilities, she is able to brain wash people into doing things for her, like commit suicide. As each person dies she ingests their souls through drinking the cerebral fluid that is drawn out of their bodies. The cerebral fluid food chain continues with her demonic minions who in turn rely on her for life as well. So comes the scene where she preforms a satanic ritual and unleashes her not 1, not 2, but 3 sets of breasts which soon begin to leak the gooey cerebral fluid from her victims. As this happens her 6 cloaked minions breast feed from her 6 breasts in celebration. 

Meanwhile, a 2 breasted local reporter, a black minister, and a cocky horny investigator are trying to track down who is responsible for these murder victims covered in this mystery fluid. Of course the cute short haired reporter and suave New York City investigator fall for each other, and realize that they too were reincarnated from a past life where they were together...and almost fell victim to our main Witch. 

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When watching this film, you can't go in to this expecting a masterpiece of film work. The director, Bruce Hickey, filmed this while taking a break from directing gay porn (probably why this movie is so awesome).This is for lovers of punk, sleaze, kitsch, cheese, cults, all the good stuff. The dialogue is hilarious, especially that of the sassy gay coroner who said "honey" at the end of every sentence....or the hookers battling with our punkette villain. A deal maker for me were the awesome outfits of our villain. Leather mini skirts, motorcycle jackets, and black tool skirts with short hair and intense makeup givers her an authentic 80s post punk look. My last point is that I like to see this film as empowering to women and even pro feminist due to the fact that our main villain is a female who uses mind control on anyone she wants, especially sleazy men. Both her and our leading woman also rock shorter hair cuts and are depicted as free thinking, strong, and independent.

You can watch this movie in full on youtube!

Nightmare on Elm Street II: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

If you read this blog chances are you have probably seen every one of films in the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise, and better yet, I can imagine that I can write about each and every single one of the films for days on end. So for this post I wanted to start with an unusual part of the series, "Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge".

The plot revolves around 17 year old Jessie, a socially awkward teen male who's family just moved into Nancy Thompson's house from the first Freddy film. Since moving in, Jessie has been having dreams of our burned face razor glove killer. As the story unfolds, weird supernatural things happen in the house. Jessie finds Nancy's old diary and her writings about her battle with Freddy Krueger, he realizes this nightmare man is now out to get him, and better yet, when he falls asleep he becomes Freddy himself, reeking havoc on teenagers of Springwood, again.

Whats odd about this film is that this is the only one in the series where Freddy is able to possess and come into contact in real life form, which ultimately creates continuity issues for the rest of the series. In the 1980's horror sequels were becoming huge, so of course bringing back Freddy was a no brainer. But why manipulate the concept so early on in the series, why part 2? Shouldn't we wait until at least part 3 like they did with "Halloween III: Season of the Witch", it didn't even have Michael Myers. Thankfully Freddy didn't go away in this film, and he came back looking more creepy than the first. The effects of Freddy Krueger coming out of Jessie's body always impressed me as well. I also need to call out my love of the cover art and it's graphic appeal. I remember seeing a 3 dimensional cut out version of this at my local video rental store, The Video Room, in Union NJ during my childhood.

Another reason why this film stands out in the series is due to the homosexual implications of the movie. Jessie for starters isn't you cockey muscle head, he is whimsy, really close to his "friend", Brady, and dances around his room to pop jams and glitter glasses. Oh, he also screams like a girl and the whole Freddy Kruger trying to come out of him, totally symbolic for keeping his sexuality in the closet.
No, this post isn't a put down on gay people. I am gay dude. So everyone please cool your jets. I also think that in some scenes Freddy and Jessie seemed to have a little sexual tension, especially the encounter they have at the foot the stairs towards the beginning. Can we also talk about the high school gym teacher? I mean, he was caught in a leather daddy bar rocking some sexy leather attire that I would wear, and then later his death scene in the high school shower room. Tied up naked and spanked with a light speed flying towel.

In researching this film, New Line Cinema doesn't deny the homosexual references that are prevalent in the film, they do however deny that it was intentional. Hard to believe, but, okay. What is great about cinema, art, and story telling is that the meaning can always vary based on the observer. I like to see this film both as an addition to the Freddy Krueger films,  but also a call out to homosexuality in the 80s.

Death Ship (1980)

If there is one thing I am a sucker for, it's really good movie cover art. Death Ship is one of those films that had me at hello. What I can't believe is that I never heard of this film before until this year after finding a post about it on Instagram. 

The cover art of this film is quite atmospheric, unique, and downright eerie. 

Our synopsis is this: A cruise ship sailing in the night is struck by an unknown "ghost ship" causing the ship to sink in minutes. The captain along with some crew members, a family, and small handful of passengers survive and manage to make it onto a life boat in time. After paddling their way through the ocean they find an ominuous black ship drifting about in the ocean. To their surprise, the ship is completely vacant of a crew or passangers but instead is full of nightmares.

Trouble starts as this mystery ship takes on a life of its own. Things move on their own causing fatal freak accidents. The surviving captain of the cruise ship becomes posessed by the ghost ship and it's original nonexistant crew. Once the survivors discover dead bodies in torture mechanisms, skeletone remains, and a freezer of corpses along with Nazi memorbilia and film reels, we learn that they are in fact on an abandoned Nazi ship in which a lot of people were killed on (both before and after the original nazi crew were aboard). 

The horror content offers a good variety..posession, hauntings, ship wrecks, and Nazism (Is this even a real word?)  The technical effects of the film aren't exactly the best. We have rough cuts, lack of footage of the actual cruise ship sinking, no footage of how people got from point A to point B... From what I heard, they also took external shots of the ship from another movie. But lets be real...if you want a "ship wreck" movie, you watch big blockbusters like The Posiedon Adventure, Titanic, etc. This is a low budget horror flick, so you can't expect big budget effects, only cut corners, which I think could have been done a little more smoothly. The film had a lot of innovative concepts, so I feel that dealines and time restraints got the best of some of this movie. 

This film however does present amazing cinematography using menacing angles from below, making our ghost ship even more eerie and threatening. My favorite shot is when the survivors on the life raft arrive to the front point of the mysterious ghost ship as it menacingly floats almost directly above them from behind. Some other note worthy scenes were the blood shower which used some unusual angles, and also the ship deck funeral in which a body was thrown off the ship to a watery grave. The shot of the body bag being dropped from the side of the ship and making a big splash I found to be a little unsettling and effective. 

I am really glad I got to see this sunken treasure of a movie (get it?).  It offers a lot in only 90 minutes. What you see on the movie cover is what you get.